Songs for a Rainy Day
by DesireeBoils
Summary: A variety of one-shot fan fics. Each one will be a different 'theme' and they will all be songs related. Some may be in the past, some may be present, and they may not all be about Erik and Christine, like I said. Different themes.
1. I Told You So

**Disclaimer: I do now own anything related to Phantom of the Opera, or the lyrics to I told you so.**

I Told You So

**Suppose I called you up tonight and told you that I loved you**

I slowly walked down the path I remembered so well, but only having traveled it once before. I knew he would still be there, and I only hoped he would forgive me for what I had done to him.

I saw a boat on the edge of the shore, and sighed, I would have to row myself across. Slowly I made my way across the murky lake. I could see dim light in the distance, but I heard no noise.

He wasn't playing on his organ. Had he given up music, or just taking a break?

The boat bumped into the shore and I climbed out.

**And suppose I said "I wanna come back home". And suppose I cried and said "I think I finally learned my lesson and I'm tired of spending all my time alone"**

"Erik!" I called out and heard my voice echo around the great underground layer.

I waited and could hear some noise coming from the back. I slowly started to make my way to the noise and saw Erik emerge from a room.

"Erik" I called again and ran to him. I threw myself into his arms. "I know what I did was wrong, and I can't live without you."

I pulled back from him and looked into his amber eyes. "I never truly loved Raoul, I have always loved you."

Erik was silently staring at me.

**If I told you that I realized you're all I ever wanted and it's killing me to be so far away. Would you tell me that you loved me too or would we cry together?**

I felt the tears spring to my eyes at his silence. "Please Erik, I can't take it anymore. Say something."

"Christine, I was so hurt when you left."

"Now I have returned, we can leave tonight and be together forever." I said. A smile came to my face and I felt the muscles pulling. I haven't smiled in such a long time.

"I love you Erik. I need my angel back to make my voice soar as it used to."

**Or would you simply laugh at me and say: "I told you so, oh I told you so. I told you someday you'd come crawling back and asking me to take you in."**

"I have a carriage ready for us. Will you get ready to leave tonight. We can go anywhere you want to."

"Christine you need to listen. We can not go anywhere tonight."

"Then tomorrow, but it must be soon. Raoul didn't understand, and he might follow me."

Erik shook his head. He held his hand out and I placed my hand in his. He started pulling me back towards the front of his lake, where his organ stood. He gently placed me on the bench.

"I need you to listen to what I have to say." Erik said quietly.

**I told you so, but you had to go. Now I found somebody new and you will never break my heart in two again.**

"Christine when you left, I thought I would die. My heart broke in two and I thought I would never be able to mend it."

"Erik I'm so sorry!" Christine said. Fresh tears sprang to my eyes and I felt as they slowly slipped down my face.

"Listen to me Christine!" Erik shouted at me.

I cringed and nodded my head.

"I am not in love with you. I love someone else."

**If I got down on my knees and told you I was yours forever. Would you get down on yours too and take my hand?**

I felt the anguish rip through my heart. "You don't love me anymore?" I whispered to him.

I leaned forward so I was looking at the ground. My breathing started coming in short blasts. I slid off the bench and onto the floor and curled up in a tiny ball.

"I'm too late."

I started thinking of the time I spent with him in my old room, practicing for a show. I remembered seeing him for the first time and feeling so safe and warm, and now he loves someone else.

I pushed myself up. He extended his hand and helped me off the floor. Always the gentleman.

**Would we get that old time feeling, would we laugh and talk for hours, the way we did when our love first began.**

"Erik, I will never forget you." I whispered.

I threw myself into his arms once again. I was shaking with silent sobs.

"We had such good times Erik. You were…are my best friend. I will never find another person like you."

"Yes you will Christine. You are a wonderful beautiful person. You just need to look." Erik said softly pushing me out of his arms.

**Would you tell me that you'd miss me too and that you'd be so lonely, and you waited for the day that I returned.**

Erik slowly walked me over to the boat and rowed me back across the lake. I sighed.

"Good bye Erik." I said as I turned, but saw him already rowing across the lake.

I made my way to the carriage that was supposed to take me and Erik away, but went empty handed.

I gave Raoul's address to the driver and sat silently as it pulled me closer to my future, though it wasn't something I wanted at the moment.

I knocked on the big door of Raoul's house, and his maid answered, she went to get Raoul.

When he came down the stairs he was shocked to see me standing there.

"Raoul, I'm so sorry. I made a mistake, please take me back."

He gladly walked to my side and took my hand.

"I have missed you so."

"I know, I have been miserable without Raoul. I love you." I said and new tears poured down my face.

**And we'd live in love forever and that I'm your one and only, or would you say the tables finally turned?**

"Christine you shouldn't have stayed away for so long. I may love you, but you have to understand."

He walked me to his parlor and sat me down. "I don't have good news. I just want you to remember that I love you and things may not seem fair, but I can not change them now."

I nodded my head with fear sinking down into my heart. I have already lost my one true love, could things get worse for me?

**Would you say I told you so, oh I told you so. I told you some day you'd come crawling back and asking me to take you in.**

"I always knew you would come back to me Christine. We were meant for each other. I have to follow what my family want. They always thought that if I married you I was marring below myself, and I tried to put my foot down, but they insisted."

"What are you trying to say Raoul?"

"I begged you not to go, and to run off with me and we could get married."

**I told you so, but you had to go. Now I found somebody new and you will never break my heart in two again. Now I found somebody new and you will never break my heart in two again.**

"My family arranged a woman for me to be married to. I told them to give you time, that you were confused, but they refused to listen."

I now knew what he was saying to me.

"I was married two days ago, and we are leaving on our honeymoon tonight."

I broke down in new sobs. I lost Erik and Raoul in one night. How could life be so unfair? I looked into his beautiful boyish face.

I nodded my head. He escorted me to my carriage.

"Goodbye Christine."

I got in, not knowing where I would go. I said goodbye to both my loves tonight. My heart was beyond repair.

Would life ever be the same for me? I didn't think so.

**Poor confused Christine. She is very young and naive with love. I really hope you liked my storyline. My daughter's favorite song is I Told You So, the version by Carrie Underwood. Please leave review, and let me know if you like it or not.**

**Desiree'**


	2. Something

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything related to Phantom of the Opera or The Beatles. This story is between Erik and someone, but I'm not going to say right now because it would ruin it. Some of my faithful readers have already read this, but read it again, because I'm adding to it. Each chapter I put up will be something different, and I will clairfy when I do put it up, what it's going to be about. I'm currently working on a Harry Potter story, but I really miss writing for Phantom of the Opera. I will have another NEW chapter up soon, but I will only write on this 'story' in my spare time.**

* * *

**Something in the way she moves**

**Attracts me like no other lover**

**Something in the way she woos me**

"I love you." Erik said quietly.

She looked back into his amber eyes.

"I love you too."

Erik placed his lips to hers and felt her shiver from excitment.

"We are going to have to tell people about us."

"Lets, just leave it to us for now." Erik said in her ear making her shiver again. Erik smiled in response to her reaction.

**I don't want to leave her now**

**You know I believe in how**

"Erik please don't leave!" She cried reaching out towards Erik

Erik turned back to her and gave her a sad smile.

"I'll come back for you, but not tonight." He said softly and turned in a swirl of his cloak.

It broke his heart to see her break down like this, and he hoped he would never have to see that painful look on her face, caused by him.

**Somewhere in her smile she knows**

**That I don't need another lover**

**Something in her style that shows me**

She flashed a smile meant only for him because she knew _he_ would be looking at her.

He saw it hidden in his private box and grinned, knowing she couldn't see him, he was hidden to well.

He saw the ring adorned on her dainty finger, and was glad that she continued to wear it, and hoped to many people hadn't seen it, for it would cause to many questions, and they just wern't ready for all those questions to pour in.

"Wait for me." He whispered and threw his voice to her. He knew she heard, because she faltered, not know where he was, and she jerked her head around to try to find him, but he was already gone.

**I don't want to leave her now**

**You know I believe in how**

"Erik, please tell me, where do you go all the time?" She asked softly from his chest. Her arms were wrapped securely around his neck.

"Please have patience love; it won't be for much longer." Erik whispered in her ear.

She reached up and traced his white porcelain mask.

"I am trying to secure our life together."

"Okay, I'll be patient then." She whispered back as she wound her hand through his hear, bringing his face closer to hers, kissing him softly on his exposed lips.

**You're asking me will my love grow**

**I don't know, I don't know**

**You stick around and it may show**

**But I don't know, I don't know.**

Erik had picked her up easily and carried her through the door of their house.

"I know things have been...tricky...for us, but have no fear, we are married now, and we can finally tell people about us."

A beautiful laugh escaped her lips. "Yes, I'm so glad, it has been to long. I'm glad I know what you have been doing now."

"Yes, it took me some time to find the perfect house for us, out where I can be myself, but close enough for you to continue performing. You don't want to give that up do you?" Erik asked as he set her down on her feet.

She looked up at him and grinned. "Of course not love, you've taught me well."

**Something in the way she knows**

**And all I have to do is think of her**

**Something in the things she shows me**

She pulled Erik's hand to her.

"What is it?" He asked concerned.

She placed his hand to her belly.

"I'm pregnant." She said and smiled.

Erik's heart fell. He didn't want to bring a child into this world, not with a face like his, but there was no way he could let her know he was upset by this. He gave her a smile, though he knew it didn't reach his eyes.

"It will be fine love, just have faith." She whispered.

Erik nodded his head.

**I don't want to leave her now**

**You know I believe in how.**

"I'm sorry sir, you have to leave."

Erik growled at the midwife.

"It is not proper for a man to be in here." She said her voice getting high. Erik threw his hands up in the air and stalked out of his own bedroom. Several hours passed, driving Erik insane with worry.

Finally a nurse came out. "You can see her now."

Erik walked into the room and saw her on the bed with a bundle in her arms.

Erik walked over to the their bed and looked down at a beautiful little girl with a perfect face and Erik sighed in relief.

"She looks just like you." Erik said placing a small kiss on each of their foreheads.

Meg looks at him and smiles. "I love you Erik."

"I love you too Meg."

**So I said there was a twist, and I added and removed a few things from the original, I hope my writing has gotten better since I originally published this lol!!! Please leave a review, letting me know if you think this is better, if you read it before. Thanks!**

**Desiree'**


	3. Love Story

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything related to Phantom of the Opera, or Taylor Swift. This story is in the present year between Erik and Christine.**

* * *

**We were both young when I first saw you**

**I close my eyes and the flash back starts**

"Christine, hurry up." Meg shouted at me.

"Okay just give me a second!" I called rolling my eyes. I loved my roommate and was glad that I actually had a good person who just clicked with me while I was at college.

I finished putting on my makeup and turned around. We were going to the first party of our sophomore year at college, and Meg wanted to hook-up with some guy and 'relieve all the stress of going back to school' which I didn't really agree with. Sex was something that should be between to people that really love each other.

We paid the taxi driver and walked into the party and from the sound of it, it was going strong. I felt Meg grab my arm. "OMG Christine look at the ass on him." Meg practically drooled in my ear. I giggled. Then I felt someone slam into me and I felt the breath get knocked out of my chest.

"Hey watch where your going dumb ass!" Meg screamed at the guy, and I waved my hand at her and panted "No...it's...okay...wasn't...watching."

"No, no I'm sorry." The guy said placing his hand on my back. When he did I felt an electric shock run through my whole body starting at where the stranger's hand was.

**I'm standing there, on a balcony in summer air**

**See the lights see the party the ball gowns**

I had been dancing a moment ago, that I was certain of, why though I wasn't sure. It was very dim when I really noticed my surroundings, and the whole room became very quiet. I looked around and everyone seemed to be staring at one thing so I turned my gaze to see a very tall man dressed in red, wearing a skull mask over the top part of his face at the top of huge staircase.

I felt an hand tighten on my arm and I jump slightly looking around to see a very handsome man holding onto me, looking furious. He let go of me and turn around, to which I ignored, I didn't know this man, and didn't know why he was holding onto me.

The man slowly in red started coming down the stairs, very graceful and drew his sword brandishing it at people yelling at them to perform better. I was confused to what exactly he was talking about, but listened nonetheless, his voice seemed to be hypnotizing me, and I allowed myself to fall into it.

**See you make your way through the crowd and say hello**

**little did I know that you were Romeo you were throwing pebbles**

The man in red walked slowly to me, reaching his hand out, and the most sensible thing for me to do was to place my hand in his, but when I tried to raise it, it wouldn't.

"Christine, come back to me, and I can make you great."

I tried to nod my head, I would do anything for that beautiful voice, but my head wouldn't oblige. His hand, that was still hanging in the air, slowly came closer to touching me, and I though he would touch my face, but instead he reached down and grabbed a necklace, that I didn't know I had been wearing and tore it from my neck.

Then my paralysis broke.

I was trying to catch my breath and hearing Meg scream at someone who ran into me.

"Your sure your okay?" The guy asked and I jerked my head around. It sounded so remarkably like the voice to the man in the red. My eyes widened and I nodded my head.

**And my daddy said stay away from Juliet**

**And I was crying on the staircase, begging you please don't go**

Meg reached down and grabbed my hand and I was lead away from the man who had captivated me.

"You don't want to talk to looser like him Christine, you can do so much better than him."

I loved Meg like a sister, but didn't know why she had to be so mean to people sometimes, and I looked over my shoulder and gave the poor guy a small smile, I didn't think he was a loser. The further Meg pulled me away from him, the more I wanted to run back to him and hold him.

I felt a plastic cup being shoved into my hands and I looked down into it.

"What is it?" I asked Meg.

"It's diet coke and vodka."

I shook my head. "No thanks." I said handing her the cup, "You know I don't drink." I said and felt frustrated at Meg. "I just need to catch my breath." I said making my way towards the back porch, but making it only to the stairs. I leaned against the newel post shaking my head at Meg.

**And I said Romeo take me somewhere we can be alone**

**I'll be waiting, all we have to do is run**

After a few deep breaths I turned to face the party and apologize for storming away from Meg and was face to face with the guy who knocked into me. I blinked in surprise and took a small step back, being startled.

"You seem to be always running into me." I said with a smile.

"I just wanted to apologize for knocking into you, I just wasn't watching where I was going."

I smiled at him. "There's nothing to forgive, it was an accident."

"Do you want to dance?" He asked and I grinned at him.

"Yeah that would be nice."

I grabbed his hand and led him away from the stairs, which seemed to be a busy place and started dancing with him. "I don't even know your name, I'm Christine." I said loudly in his ear so he could hear me.

"Erik." He said back, it was hard to hear him over the thumping music.

"What?" I shouted back over the music. "Let's go outside, maybe I can hear you out there." I shouted and nodded my head towards the open doorway.

**You'll be the Prince, and I'll be the Princess**

**It's a love story baby just say yes**

"So what did you say your name was?" I asked when we were finally out of the loudness of the house.

He chuckled. "I'm Erik, it's nice to meet you Christine."

"So do you go to school here?" I asked him.

"Yeah, I'm a senior, you?"

"Sophomore." I said with a smile. "It seems like I know you though."

"We went to high school together."

I was surprised, "Really, how do you know that."

"I remember you. You were the prom queen right."

I laughed. "I was, but I don't remember you, but you are a few years older than me, so that's probably why, but why do I know you then?"

"I was the prom king in my year."

So Meg was wrong, he wasn't a loser, and I knew it. "I guess that makes us royalty." I said with a grin.

**So I sneak out to the garden to see you**

**We keep quiet cause were dead if they knew**

I rolled over, not having gone to sleep. I had been six weeks since Erik and I met at the party. I saw that it was a quarter to midnight and I silently crawled out of my bed, putting my street clothes back on. Meg had no idea that Erik and I had been dating, and I wanted to keep it that way. At least for now. No one knew about the two of us.

I walked through the silent halls, which I thought was odd, it was almost midnight, but of course it was only a Tuesday, people must be actually sleeping instead of partying, like normal. Erik and I had planned to meet out by the fountains. We never got to spend a lot of time together, he had his classes and friends, and so did I, but we found plenty of time for each other nonetheless.

When I got there, Erik was already waiting for me and he turned when he heard someone walking up on him. He was holding a single red rose in his hand and I grinned at him. I kissed him on the cheek, on both cheeks and could smell his aftershave.

"You didn't have to do that." I said grinning.

"Well you deserved it." Erik said. He pulled me close and I placed my arms on his shoulders, linking my hands behind his neck, with the rose poking out of my fingers.

"I love you." He whispered, and though my cheek was on his chest I knew he would hear my small intake of breath.

"Oh, I get it." He stated simply trying to pull him away.

It was after a second, after he was out of my arms that I frowned at him.

"Just where do you think you are going?" I said with my hands on my hips.

He turned his back to me and I sighed, grabbing his arm and turned him to face me. "I love you too, I just couldn't believe you said it before me." I said with a smile and quickly crashed my lips to his, making him gasp in surprise.

**So Close your eyes, escape this town for a little while**

**Cause you were Romeo, I was a scarlet letter**

"So a week at your parents, then a week at mine." I said throwing clothes nervously into my suitcase. We had finally told Meg about us, and now it was time to tell the parents. We had now been dating for three months, and it was just the right time.

The week with his parents were lovely. They accepted me, just like a member of their own, of course it was nice having met them before, we did grown up in the same town, though we were a few years apart, the smallish town we came from, everyone seemed to know everything about everyone, one reason I was so glad to escape to college.

"Christine, you have made Erik so happy. So when are you two tying the knot?" Ashley, Erik's mother asked.

"Geez mom!" Erik said shaking his head. "Do you mind!" He said rolling his eyes.

I grinned up at Erik and patted his hand. 'Don't worry about it' I mouthed to him with a wink and he winked back at me.

Besides that one painfully embarrassing moment, the rest of the visit went very smoothly.

**And my daddy said stay away from Juliet, but you were everything to me**

**I was begging you please don't go**

The trip to my house however wasn't as grand as I hoped it would be.

"Christine, I don't like this one bit." James, my father raged at me.

I had tears in my eyes. "Daddy, please don't do this, not now. I love him, and he loves me." I cried out.

"He isn't right for you dear. You were supposed to get out of this small town, not be dragged back to it by a local boy."

I shook my head. "I'm going to do what I want, I'm an adult now, and he makes me happy."

James walked closer to me and put his hands on my shoulders. The comfort I used to feel from his touch didn't come like it once had. "You have to respect my decision." I said softly, feeling the temper tantrum I had just thrown start to melt away.

He pulled me into a hug. "Then I guess that's all I can ask for."

"Thank you." I whispered. "Just be nice to him okay daddy?"

**And I said Romeo take me somewhere we can be alone**

**I'll be waiting all we have to do is run**

I opened Erik's door at my fathers house, he refused to have us sleep in the same room, and saw him already waiting for me. I quickly stepped in and closed the door behind me.

"Do you want to go for a walk?" He asked quietly, and I nodded my head. I led him out the window, thankfully he was on the ground floor, so it would be easy to get back in. After that I followed him to a strange location. It was in front of a pet store that I had been to before, of course it was locked.

"So what are we doing here?" I asked in confusion.

"Kiss me." He said, and I greatly complied.

"Now why did I kiss you in front of this pet store?"

He grinned at me. "This is where I had my first kiss, and I wanted to kiss you here, erase the old memory and replace it with a new one."

"Gah Erik. I just stole some girls spot." I said even though I was grinning. "You are too weird."

Erik grinned back at me. "You have to admit, this is a better memory to have."

I did agree.

**You'll be the Prince, and I'll be the Princess,**

**it's a love story baby just say yes**

Both Erik and I were going to Erik's 5 year reunion. Of course I knew everyone there, they were just a few years older than me. We were dancing to some of the 'good old music' as Erik kept referring it to when I felt something being tied around my middle.

I turned to see that years class president and looked down at the sash I was now wearing. It was bright blue and had silver writing as cutest couple. I turned to Erik and he was wearing the exact same sash. I laughed out loud and he pointed proudly to his chest. We heard courses of 'speech, speech' and we were dragged up to the stage and walked to the podium.

"Well I just want to thank you for making us royalty at our reunion." I said into the microphone, and everyone laughed.

"This was very unexpected, and we would both like to say thank you for this." He pulled me close to his side and I looked up at him and he kissed me, and I could hear wolf whistles and I pulled away grinning and shaking my finger at the crowd, making them laugh harder.

It was nice to be back in my old town, but not at the same time. The reason I didn't like being back, was because of my father. He was an only parent, and wanted me to succeed and get out of this town, of course I still had one year left of college, and I had every intention of moving back to my hometown after I graduated, along with Erik. He was still hanging around the town our college was in for me.

**Romeo save me their trying to tell me how to feel**

**This love is difficult, but it's real**

I felt the tears streaming down my face as I left my own house to walk to Erik's house. We were planning on returning to the college tomorrow, and I wouldn't be staying with my father the rest of this day, or tomorrow morning.

He had once again tried to tell me to break it off with Erik and get out of this town while I still could, but I refused, and we had really gotten into it. I just couldn't understand how he could be so uncaring as to how his only child felt, and he seemed to not care that the words that came out of his mouth cut me deeper than if he had taken a knife to me.

I blindly found Erik's parents house and knocked on the door, trying to whip the tears that were coursing down my cheeks.

The second Erik saw me on the front steps, he pulled me into a hug, not bothering asking what my tears where, he knew what they were about. I silently thanked him by not bringing it up, I didn't want to talk about it, at least not right now.

"You know I'll always be here." He whispered in my ear and I nodded my head. He led me into the house and made me sit, and he said everything would be alright and not to worry about what people said, our love would conquer everything.

**Don't be afraid we'll make it out of this mess**

**it's a love story baby just say yes.**

"Christine, please stop crying, it breaks my heart to see you cry."

I nodded my head and blew my nose on a tissue. I grabbed another tissue from the box and dried my face.

He gave me a small smile. "I promise you this will blow over. I know your father wants more for you, he's just being a dad, give him time and he will see how much we truly love each other, and how we make each other happy, so our location shouldn't matter."

He kissed the top of my forehead and I grinned back at him. Erik always knew what to say to make me feel better.

I sighed. "I know, thanks baby. I love you."

"I love you too."

**I got tired of waiting, wondering if you were ever coming around**

**My faith in you was fading**

"Erik we have been together for 3 years now, when are we going to move on from our current position that we seem to be stuck in?" I asked him as we drove back into our sleepy college town.

Erik never took his eyes off the road, but I could see the small frown on his face.

"I don't want to push you Erik, but we love each other, and if you are not going to make an honest woman out of me, than what are we still doing together?" I asked softly.

After he had dropped me off, he said he needed to get some groceries for our little house we had at the college, I walked to Meg's dorm and cried on her shoulder.

"Why can't he just propose to me? I know he loves me." I cried on his shoulder.

Meg softly patted my back, not really knowing what could be said.

I had moved out of our little house, and moved in with Meg, and her new room mate. I can't live with someone who has no intention of becoming more that what we already were.

There was harsh words, and tears, but in the end, I did what I felt had to be done.

**And I met you on the outskirts of town and I said**

**Romeo save me I've been feeling so alone **

**I keep waiting for you, but you never come**

It had only been a week since our 'break up' and hadn't tried to call, or see me and that broke my heart. After a month Erik had finally cornered me outside of one of my classes. I was so happy to see him again, and I missed him terribly, but I wasn't going to change my mind and it broke my heart all over again to see him standing there waiting for me.

"Christine, I still love you, please come home." Erik said as he came close to me.

"Oh Erik." I said with a sigh. The words I desperately wanted to say started to escape my lips, but I held them back.

"Don't you still love me?" He asked with a very hurtful look in his eyes.

I turned to him "Oh of course I still love you Erik, but I can't do this anymore. I've gotten in way to deep, and I can't go anymore, or I won't come back from this heart break." I said quickly and left him standing alone.

**Is this in my head I don't know what to think**

**He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring and said**

**Marry me Juliet, you'll never be alone I love you and that's all I really know**

I didn't get very far when he reached me and pulled me to a stop. "Please, I wanted to do this for years, I just never knew the right moment, then you walked out on me, and I have never been as miserable as I have been in this past month. I thought that you didn't want me, but I know that you do. Marry me Christine, I've wanted to marry you since I saw you your first day of your freshman year."

I looked at him shocked. Was he really saying those words to me, or just trying to get me to believe he really wanted to marry me.

"I love you Christine, and I never want to spend another day apart from you."

I felt the tears sting my eyes and I smiled up at him. "Aren't you supposed to be down on bended knee?" I asked him.

He laughed and pulled me into a hug. "Does that mean you accept?"

I pulled back from him. "Oh of course it does you silly man."

**I talked to your dad, go pick out a white dress**

**It's a love story, baby just say yes.**

We walked hand in hand back to Meg's room to collect my things. "Oh I just thought of something." I said biting my lip.

"And what is that?" Erik asked me.

"What will my dad say?"

I felt Erik stop, so I stopped as well, and turned to look at him.

"Well I kind of asked for his permission."

I looked at him shocked. "Are you serious?" I asked.

Erik nodded his head. "So what did he say?"

"Well he could see the way I talked about you, and said your name, and he finally says that we are good together, and just wants to see you happy."

I laugh and hug Erik tight. "Thank you for asking him."

**Cause we were both young when I first saw you**

"Did you really notice me my freshman year?" I asked him the day before our wedding.

"Christine, you were the most beautiful thing to ever step through those doors, and when I saw that curly hair of yours, looking all shy and nervous, I knew at that moment I wanted you forever."

I kissed him softly. "You truly are the most wonderful man I have ever met." I said softly.

**A bit lengthly I know, but I just couldn't help it! Please let me know what you think by leaving me a review. I hope I havn't confused you to much by taking Something down and adding it as a second chapter to what was originally I Told You So.**

**Desiree'**


	4. Eyes on Fire

**I do not own anything related to Phantom of the Opera, or the lyrics of Eyes on Fire by Blue Foundation. Okay so this story is what Erik was really thinking during the movie, and I've twisted things around to not only fit the song, but things that happened in the movie. I'm sorry if I left a few things out, but I'm doing the plot all by memory because a friend stole my movie, and I havn't seen it it over a year lol!**

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**I seek you out, flay you alive**

**One more word and you won't survive**

I quietly stood in the shadows watching them rehearse. Christine was dancing beautifully, as she always did, and it infuriated me that she was still only a chorus girl. That would be changing very soon though. The plans had be set in motion and she worked to hard to not have the limelight.

When Carlotta started warming up I cringed. Her vocal cords were worse than any sound I had heard before, and I couldn't stand to hear it anymore. It was so easy. A flick of the wrist and the loose knot dropped a back drop on her. Problem solved.

My attention was quickly drawn to Christine, who looked frightened. She would not be happy to learn her angel's real persona. There was little I could do about that, and she will get over it in time. I saw the new managers, and their new patron. It would be good to have some money plunged into my theater, it was starting to lack in every department.

Once again I saw Christine, and her friend Meg talking, and the way Christine was fluttering her eyelashes, and had a small blush creep to her face I knew something was wrong. Her eyes kept darting to the new patron. Damn, why had I not been paying enough attention to find out who he was, but I saw her say his name. Raoul. My blood began to boil. I quickly dropped my note for Madam Giry to find and followed the Vicomt as I know who he was.

It would be so easy. Another quick flick of the wrist and my Punjab would be around his neck breaking his neck. I got it out, planning on killing him quickly, I didn't like the way Christine said his name. Though I couldn't hear her say it, just the way her face looked made me see red.

As soon as I was about to kill him someone stumbled upon him.

"Vicomt! Have you heard, this Opera House is haunted!" The new manager Firmin said and laughed. "They are so superstitious. I almost feel like walking under a ladder to prove my point."

Raoul laughed. "No I haven't heard, but I really must be going. I will be here later tonight."

I cringed back into the shadows and made my departure.

**And I'm not scared of your stolen power**

**I see right through you any hour**

I had half a mind to follow the Vicomt to his house and kill him there. Christine would be fine getting ready for the show, she would be singing in the lead tonight, and she would be nervous. It's best that I leave her until later tonight.

I made myself invisible and followed his carriage, I always stuck to the shadows, hiding me completely. A few guards stood outside his house, and it would be so lovely to kill them, but I decided against it. He was royalty and that would cause a scene to find him strangled to death in his own house. It seemed like he was the big man, but it didn't fool me. Most royalty was useless in everything.

As the day grew short I went back to my Opera House and made the preparations for that evening. The curtains were being pulled when I silently made my way to my box, but low and behold the Vicomt was sitting it it. The injustice of it all! How dare he steal my box, I will have to make sure the managers understand all my orders from now on. They wouldn't be happy with the outcome if they didn't.

"Beware, you will not sit here again, I can make your life a living hell." I said throwing my voice to make it sound like I was sitting right next to him. The Vicomt jumped so high I nearly laughed. The frightened look on his face was exactly what I was expecting, and I knew it would be all but easy to kill this man.

**I won't sooth your pain, I won't ease your strain**

**You've been waiting in vain, I got nothing for you to gain**

As soon as the words were out of my mouth I left. I had more important matters to attend to, like congratulating Christine on her outstanding performance. I had decided to show my true self to her tonight.

I watched from my usual perch behind her mirror and rage as I have never felt before ripped through me when _he_ showed up, unaccompanied. Could he not understand that she wished to please her angel? I had taught her well, she was determined to stay behind and please me, but he didn't listen. My time was short, so I had to act now.

I showed myself to her, and Christine was drawn to me. There was no look of horror in her eyes as she walked towards me and I led her down to my lair. I confessed my love to her, showing that I had intentions of marring her. The excitement must have been to much for her, because she fainted, and I easily carried her to the room I designed just for her.

To pass the time I composed more of my music, that always soothed me. I heard her wake and try to find me, trying to convince herself that last night wasn't a dream. I slowly turned towards her and she looked confused. She slowly came towards me, and my heart seemed to swell just at the sight of her. When she touched my face I could have sworn my heart stopped for a moment, but she did the unthinkable. She removed my mask, and I felt no pity as I threw her to the ground.

That vile woman. How dare she! I turned to see her crying, a sight that would normally knock me to my knees asking what I could do to please her, but I felt no remorse. There was nothing to gain from seeing the true side of me. The monster. After moments of anger on my part I turned to see her pleading with her eyes, holding my mask out towards me. I grabbed it out of her delicate hands and secured it back in place. I had no choice but to take her back up to where she belonged.

**I'm taking it slow feeding my flame**

**Shuffling the cards of your game**

I decided to send another reminding not to the new managers of my Opera House, putting them in their place. It wasn't until the last moment that I wrote a note to the Vicomt. He needed to be taught a lesson to leave Christine alone, she was mine. Whatever his plan was on taking her away wouldn't work. I would block every plan he had.

My power in my Opera house was growing with every fear that came off anyone's body. I could sense the fear in the managers, and even the performers. I would soon have all the power I needed to take action for their disobedience. No one would ever think twice of crossing me again.

I was amused at the plan that the Vicomt had to win her away, I followed him all day. It wouldn't be very easy for him to steal Christine away from me when he was dead, and that time was coming very quickly. I was growing tired of his plans and schemes.

**And just in time, in the right place**

**Suddenly I will play my Ace**

The managers were making a deadly decision. They decided not to listen to me and place Carlotta as the lead and Christine as the silent page boy. The disobedience was truly outrageous. Not only had they not put Christine as the lead, but that _boy_ was in my box for the performance. Unacceptable. It was quite easy to make Carlotta croak, she was basically a toad in disguise as it was. Just my first step to this unforgettable night.

It was only a matter of time that I made my self noticeable, at least in voice. The managers were truly scared, and my plan was working perfectly. They had no choice now as to put Christine in the lead, where she should have been all along. The timing was perfect.

It was unfortunate that the backhand had to die, but he was far to much in my way. He did serve his purpose, they knew I was real, and I was deadly, and not to cross me. I let him hang from the rafters as pandemonium broke out. I made my way to the rooftop to watch the carnage below in the street, the perfect position to keep a view on things.

I was very surprised when Christine, and the Vicomt showed up on the roof moments after I did.

**I won't sooth your pain, I won't ease your strain**

**You've been waiting in vain, I've got nothing for you to gain**

I couldn't help but watch as they confessed their love for one another. It felt as if Christine had taken her delicate hand and wrenched my beating heart out of my chest. It was then that I knew she would never comfort me. Would never take the stress from my shoulders, and I knew I had lost my one true love. She was something I could never have. All the time I plunged into her seemed like a waste.

I stood there brokenhearted, no that wasn't what I felt, it was much worse than than. I vowed then and there that everyone would pay for the pain she caused me. I knew if I could get her alone again that I could win her over. It was the only shot I had. She was so easily manipulated, and my voice was the perfect tool.

I didn't know how I went on with the agony I felt ripped through me. I couldn't do anything for months, I was nothing.

**Eyes on fire your spine is ablaze**

**Feeling any foe with my gaze**

I had to be more careful now. They knew I was real, and very serious when it came to my demands. I followed the managers, and the Vicomt waiting for the right moment to spring on them and kill them, but it wasn't what I wanted. It was more than wanting them to pay for what they did to me. I wanted more than revenge.

I had to make due with the simple fear of scaring the performers. They were already frightened, and I knew I already looked like the living dead, but what Christine had done to me had left me beyond broken. It was so easy to get the simple pleasure of briefly showing myself to anyone. Seeing the fear in their eyes, hearing their hearts leap out of their chests. I could see the terror rolling down their spines. I had to make due with this.

When they were having their grand ball to celebrate my absence, I knew I had to make my appearance then. I had finished my opera.

**And just in time in the right place**

**Steadily emerging with grace**

I donned my costume as red death, thinking the costume choice was to perfect to pass up. I gracefully walked towards the managers thrusting my opera into their arms. They had my demands and I could see in their eyes they intended to go through with it. I had reappeared at the right moment, and the months of silence was perfect. It lulled them into a false sense of security.

I had feared that I couldn't get Christine alone, but as I watched her one morning, as I always did, she made plans to visit her father's grave. That was the right place to make my approach to her once again.

She was so close to submitting everything she had to me. If I had only minutes left, she would have been completely under my control, but it was ruined. The Vicomt stole her away from me, and not for the first time.

**Feeling any foe with my gaze**

**Steadily emerging with grace**

It would have been so easy to kill him, but at the last moment inspiration stuck. Let him think he won, have him gain his confidence, then when I defeated him, not only would he loose Christine, but the confidence he felt himself would be shattered.

I locked eyes with him one last time and the perfect plan came to me. I knew exactly how to make everyone pay for what they have done to me.

As graceful as ever I set my plan into motion. Everything was perfect.

**Feeling any foe with my gaze**

**Steadily emerging with grace**

It was too easy to dispose of the people I needed disposed of. I walked out onto stage and turned to Christine. She was slowly falling under my power again. I turned my face upward to see the Vicomt looking down at me from my box and I saw the pain in his face. My plan was working out perfectly.

Christine took everything in stride, performing like she should, like nothing was wrong. It wasn't until I had confessed my true love for her that she ripped the mast from my face. I didn't know that would happen, but I had prepared for everything. I quickly grabbed my sword from my sheath and cut the rope. I had rigged it so that if cut, the chandelier would come plunging down.

I kicked the lever to release the trap door, and I stole Christine down to the deepest part of hell with me.

**Feeling any foe with my gaze**

**Steadily emerging with grace **

I knew all to well that he would follow, so I was prepared when he showed up, finally throwing my Punjab around his neck. Sweet victory. I was so close to him that I could see his heart breaking through his eyes.

It was a choice Christine had to choose. Pick me, and let him go, or pick him and he would die by my hand. She choose me and my heart swelled. When she pressed her lips to mine it was as if an angel had kissed me.

I saw the sadness in those eyes I loved so much and I knew I would rather die than to see that look on her face everyday.

I'm not sure how I could say the words I did, but I got them out. Christine turned and released her true love, and I knew she never loved me. It wasn't until they sailed away that what was left of me shattered completely. I left the only home I had really known and disappeared into the wilderness to live the rest of my life as best I could.

**I really hoped you liked my version to the story. I really want to thank waggers12345 for adding my story to story alert, and IamthePhantomoftheOpera for adding my story to the story alert. Please review and let me know what you think, I really like reading and responding to all my reviewers!**

**Desiree'**


	5. Satellite Heart

Disclaimer: I do not own Phantom of the Opera, or Satellite Heart by Anya Marina. Okay so this story doesn't have Erik in it. I know it's sad, but I just thought Raoul fit better in this story than Erik did, so if your mad at me, just review and yell at me lol! Well review weather your mad or not lol!

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**So pretty so smart**

**Such a waste of a young heart**

I stomped down the hall to my room, my hands shaking in rage. I tried to keep the last ten minutes of angry conversation with my father out of my head. This should have been a happy moment filled with squeals of delight, instead my memory is filled with tears and hurtful words.

When I reached my room I nearly flew through the opening and I turned and slammed the door shut. It mad an ugly sound and I hoped it knocked a picture off the wall. The reason for the drama was I had gotten my acceptance letter to Berkeley. I was overjoyed! My father wanted me to go to school closer to home, like the University of Kentucky. We lived only a short one hour drive from Lexington where the school was located.

Why did I have to apply close to home? I was ready to leave this southern town, but for me than one reason. Raoul was going to Berkeley, he had it planned out for years, and nothing was going to stop him from going, so nothing would stop me, he is my everything.

But I couldn't leave, possibly forever, with my father wishing against it. It has been the two of us since my mother passed away when a drunk driver ran a stop light and killed her. I was only six when she died. My poor father had to cope with not only loosing his wife, but trying to raise his only child. I love my father, and I can't bear to think he's mad at me, but could I live without Raoul?

**What a pity, what a sham**

**What's the matter with you man**

Raoul held me in his arms, tightly and I clung to him even tighter never wanting to have him leave the length of my arms.

"What should I do Raoul? I can't leave him to fend for himself, he would be lost without me. Please think about U of K." I said into his chest. I felt the tears spill over my lashes. They ran hot and wet into Raoul's dark blue shirt, they didn't even have a chance to roll down my cheeks, I was still plastered to Raoul.

"I'm sorry." He whispered.

My heart, which was already beating to fast, seemed to stop all together. I wrenched myself out of his arms to look at his face in horror. His face was a mask of nothing. There was no emotion on his face at all. I didn't realize I had been holding my breath until it came out of me in gasps.

"I...I don't understand." I managed to blurt out. That was an understatement. "Your sorry because you hate seeing me like this, or because you won't even consider U of K?" My voice had been getting steadily louder with each word.

"I won't consider U of K. I'm not going to throw my life away because you won't stand up to your father."

I took another step back from him. My whole world seemed to be crashing down around me.

"What am I then?!?" I shrieked at him. "We are going to start a life together, marriage, a house, a family! Your going to throw away our last three years away for a stupid school?" I continued to scream at him in rage.

Rage as I've never felt before coursed through my whole body. How could Raoul do something this painful to me?

**Don't you see what's wrong, can't you get it right**

**Out of mind and out of sight**

The end of school was in sight. I urged the time to hurry, being in the same building with Raoul for three out of seven hours five days a week was torture. Every time I saw him, I felt like he had just slapped me across the face. I didn't understand how he seemed so calm and collected, while I was falling apart at the seams.

It was easier for me to coop when I was actually didn't see him. The four classes that I didn't share with Raoul was bliss for me. It was almost like someone else moved into my head for those few hours, but then as soon as class was over my europhic mood vanished. My heart was broken into pieces, and he didn't seem to care at all. It would be so easy to fix everything, just change school. He would still get a fantastic education.

I looked back over the last few days and my pain wasn't easing. Wasn't time supposed to heal all wounds? Why wasn't this getting any easier? It had been a month since Raoul spoke those horrible words to me.

**Call on all your girls don't forget the boys**

**put a lid on all that noise**

"Christine, come on, it will be fun!" Lily said with a smile on her face. "I've already got an okay from your dad." Lily was bouncing on the balls of her feet.

A slumber party did sound nice. A chance to get away from everything. I bit my lip wanting to say no, but knowing I didn't really want to. Lily knew I was caving and she squealed and hugged me tightly.

So later that evening Lily, Ruth, LeeAnn, and I were watching A Nightmare on Elm Street. It wasn't scary, and we ended up giggling through most of the movie. I was already wanting to shut it off and hit the sack, but it was only eleven, way to early to sleep at a slumber party. It was the screaming that was getting to me. I just wanted to shut if off.

A low tapping noise made me jump out of my brooding. There was at least six boys outside the window. Lily, Ruth, and LeeAnn grinned and jumped off the couch and ran towards the door. I let them go without me. I had no interest in being with any boy, they all reminded me of Raoul.

**I'm a satellite heart lost in the dark**

**I'm spun out so far you stop I start**

**but I'll be true to you**

LeeAnn came back in the house and gave me a small smile. "Christine, Raoul is asking for you."

My heart seemed to fill with hope. Was he finally coming to say he changed his mind? I jumped off the couch and almost ran to LeeAnn.

"Was he happy looking?" I asked with excitement in my voice. Her smile became more pronounced and she nodded her head quickly and I rushed past her and out of the door. Raoul was standing next to a tree by himself. He opened his arms when he saw me, and I flung myself into his arms.

"I'm so glad you changed your mind." I said and found his lips with mine. I felt whole again. He kissed me back, but pulled away before I wanted him too.

"Christine, I didn't change my mind." Raoul said startled.

The light that was in my life was gong, like someone had blown out the only candle in a dark room. I shoved against him, hard.

"Then why did you come here?" I asked. I felt lost. My mind was so gone, I didn't think I could stand any more hurt. I didn't wait to hear his response. I turned away from him and ran. I wanted desperately to be found again. I was surrounded by nothing but darkness.

It would be sweet revenge to go back and kiss someone, anyone, right in front of Raoul, but I could never do that. Despite everything that had gone on, I still loved him, and I always would.

**I hear your living out of state**

**Running in a whole new scene**

A know on my door made me stop packing my suitcase.

"Com in." I said and continued folding my clothes. It was Lily.

"Getting ready to leave?" She asked. I grinned and nodded my head. I was actually getting really excited about tomorrow.

"Have you heard about Raoul?" Lily asked me. I knew this was the reason for her visit.

"No." I said curtly. I hadn't spoken or seen him since that night under the tree. "What about him?"

"Well he made it to Berkeley yesterday. I didn't know if he said goodbye to you or not."

I felt ice around my heart. I had been secretly hoping he would still change his mind, but deep down I knew. He didn't even call me. A tear slipped down my face and when I looked up, Lily was gone. Time alone was something I didn't need, but Lily wouldn't have known that.

I started throwing things into my suitcase, not caring if they were folded or not. Tonight would be my last night in this house for a several months. My father suggested I live at home and commute, but I wanted to leave. Maybe try to start over.

**You know I haven't slept in weeks**

**Your the only thing I see**

It was strange living in a dorm. Lily was my dorm mate, and that was nice, but it was final. I was an adult, living on my own.

Night after night, after night I tossed and turned trying to sleep, but it hardly came, and when it did it wasn't restful. I tried to tell myself it was because I was worried about my father, but I knew better. Raoul was everywhere. In my dreams, down the hall, in my classes. I couldn't escape his face.

From time to time my father would tell me how Raoul was doing. He was still friendly with Raoul's mother. He never said anything about any kind of relationships, to which I was grateful, I wouldn't be able to handle hearing about Raoul's romances. It was hard enough seeing his face on any guy I passed.

**I'm a satellite heart lost in the dark**

**I'm spun out so far you stop I start**

**But I'll be true to you**

All four years of college I was alone, but it was by choice. There had been plenty of guys who were interested in her, but her heart was still Raoul's. I didn't pine for him or anything, or cry myself to sleep, but every time I would consider another guy, he wouldn't be as good as Raoul, and I wouldn't even consider him.

I was still lost in the darkness of my heart. It was no longer broken, but mended. The wound was to fresh to even think of any more damage. If I were to let someone in and he broke my heart, I would never recover from it. I was at least happy. Well at least as happy as I could be.

My father was happy when I graduated because I moved back in with him, at least until I could find something for myself. I was just walking out to my car to get a bite to eat at town when I saw a tall figure leaning against the hood of my car and I almost ran back inside when he called out to me. My heart constricted.

**No matter what you do**

**Yeah I'll be true to you**

Music started and my heart swelled. I smiled at Raoul as he walked down the aisle. He looked stunning in his black tux and pearly gray tie. My dress swished around me, and he squeezed my hand. People were cheering for us. I thought back to when Raoul had got home from Berkeley.

When I saw it was Raoul on the hood of my car I glared at him. I didn't dare speak to him for fear of how I really felt for him would come out of my mouth.

"Christine...I'm so sorry." Raoul said.

My eyes softened. It was so hard to be mad at Raoul.

"I should have never chosen some stupid school over you. I was a fool, thought I knew it all, I ca." But my mouth stopped him.

My love for him didn't return like nothing had ever happened, we simply fell in love with each other once again. There was still a wound there, but he had helped heal it, and seal it over.

It wasn't until we were on a plane heading towards our honeymoon that he said. "Christine, thank you for marrying me."


	6. According To You

**Disclaimer: I do now own anything related to Phantom of the Opera or the song According To You by Orianthi. Okay so this story is a modern day fan fic, Erik is still disfigured. WARNING: If you don't like reading a Raoul bashing, then don't read this chapter because I don't bash him, but he's not nice in this chapter at all.** **If it looks funny, I'm sorry I've had to add this chapter the back way because they won't let me upload it the normal way.**

**According to you I'm stupid, I'm useless, I can't do anything right**

**According to you I'm difficult, hard to please, forever changing my mind**

"God Christine, can't you do anything right?" Raoul said to Christine.

She looked down at the burnt casserole. It wasn't like she burnt it on purpose, she had just lost track of time. It was easy for Christine to loose herself in her music. She had been in the little room that had her upright piano, and a computer. There was a clock on the wall, but why look at it when she was playing?

"I'm sorry Raoul." Christine said as she bit her lip. "I guess we should just go out and eat." She suggested.

Raoul let out a sigh. "That was probably your intention." He muttered. "Go get your coat." He said getting up from the table. "Chinese is quick, I want to get back for the game."

Scrunching up her nose, Christine said, "I just had Chinese yesterday, what about Italian?"

Continuing to mumble to himself, Christine though she heard him say 'so damn hard to please' and 'why does she always have to be difficult' so she hung her head in shame.

"I'm sorry Raoul, Chinese will be fine." She said quietly as she grabbed her jacket off the coat rack on the wall next to the door. Her and Raoul have lived together for two years now. They met at college, and hit it off from the start. Raoul was going to school for graphic design and Christine as a music major. When they both graduated, it was obvious they were going to stay together, so they rented an apartment and has been there ever since.

**I'm a mess in a dress, can't show up on time, even if it would save my life**

**According to you. According to you**

When the company Raoul worked for promoted him to Vice President, a huge party was held for him to congratulate him on his hard work and success.

"Go, go." Christine said with a smile and a wave. "I have to work till 6, but I will be there on time, I promise." She gave Raoul a quick kiss. Christine worked on Broadway, they were working on a new piece that would be opening in about a week.

"Seven on the dot." Raoul said tapping his watch, and Christine gently pushed him toward the exit.

Rushing home from work, she knew she would be late. She had to shower, do her hair and makeup, and get dressed. It was one of those elegant parties, so it was a black tie attire. Sitting in the darkened cab she finished putting on her makeup. It was now a quarter to eight. Christine had long curly hair, and she didn't have time to do an up-do, so she put a clip in it to try and fancy it up a bit. It may not be formal, but it would have to do for the time being.

When Christine placed her hands over her eyes, she grinned and said, "Guess who."

"Your late." Raoul said with a sigh. He reached up and grabbed her hands from his face. He turned and let out another sigh. "Christine, this is a black tie party." She looked down at her dress, it was bright red, and sequined. The straps were an inch thick and the back crisscrossed. It hugged her every curve until it got below her hips then hung straight till it touched the floor.

"It's a formal dress Raoul." Christine said a little hurt, she though she looked nice.

"Your dress is the only formal thing, you didn't even put your hair up. I guess it will just have to do." He said and sighed. Raoul reached out and grasped her hand. "I'll introduce you to my bosses."

**But according to him I'm beautiful, incredible, he can't get me out of his head**

**According to him I'm funny, irresistible, everything he ever wanted**

"Christine, that was perfect!" Erik exclaimed with his half smile. Today he was wearing a white cloth mask to match his white button down shirt.

"Good, does that mean we can stop for the night?" She asked with a smile and started packing up her music. "I'm parched. Do you want to get a drink?" She asked and looked up from her packing.

"Your not going home?" Erik asked in surprise.

"Raoul's out of town on some big business thing."

So they made their way to the closest bar/restaurant and got a booth. Erik was Christine's best friend. He worked with her, and they became friends from day one. She wasn't much of a drinker, so she was drinking a white wine spritzer, and normally Erik wasn't a huge drinker either, but he ordered a shot of whiskey and threw it back as soon as the glass hit the table.

"Is something wrong?" Christine asked with real concern in her voice.

"Why are you with Raoul Christine?" Erik asked softly. He never talked to her about Raoul, they didn't really get along. Raoul thought Erik was a freak the way he always covered his face, and was upset that him and Christine were close friends.

"He's so mean to you, always putting you down. Your perfect just the way you are. When I go home I think about you, I can't stop thinking of you, and I try not to because you with him, but it's everything you do from your voice to the way you laugh. I've tried to tell myself that your happy with him, but I can tell myself that your happy with him, but I can tell your not. Your everything I've ever wanted and I know I'm dropping a bomb on you, but I can't take it anymore."

Christine's mouth dropped slightly. "I have to go, I'm sorry." She said and bolted from the restaurant.

**Everything is opposite, I don't feel like stopping it**

**So baby tell me what I've got to loose**

**He's into me for everything I'm not, according to you**

As soon as she closed the door to the apartment they both shared, Christine picked up the phone.

_Raoul isn't mean to me, he just pointed out some faults, they were there and he just brought them to my attention_.

Maybe this was just a dream, maybe Erik didn't just tell her he found her irresistible. Raoul's phone rang and rang and she thought he was going to let it go to his voice-mail when he picked up.

"Raoul, you love me right?" Was the first thing she said when he picked up.

"What a stupid question Christine, of course I love you." Christine could tell he was agitated from her question. "Why do you ask?"

Should Christine tell him the truth? It would only cause Raoul to hate Erik more, and he wouldn't want them to hang out, not that they do much outside work, so she told him what Erik said, but told Raoul it was in a note, and she didn't know who sent it to her. Now that Christine thought, really thought, she realized she had feelings for Erik that were not strictly platonic.

Would she be throwing a good thing away with Raoul? "Those are stupid reasons for someone to like you Christine." Raoul's voice rang out through the phone. "Besides your not those things."

**According to you I'm boring, I'm moody, and you can't take me any place**

**According to you I suck at telling jokes cause I always give it away**

**I'm the girl with the worst attention span, your the boy who puts up with that**

**According to you, according to you**

Christine didn't have the guts to face Erik the next day, so she called in sick, and then it was the weekend, and Raoul came home on Sunday. Christine nearly pounced on him when he walked through the door and she started telling him about the music piece she was working on. Raoul's eyes seemed to glaze over and his response became automatic. "Christine, I've just got home, you know I can't really follow your music talk."

Deciding to change tracks she started telling him this joke she heard on the radio. "Yeah, I've heard that one." He said.

Christine threw her hands into the air. "You don't have any respect for me Raoul, you just think I'm stupid, don't you! I'm going to go work on my music." She said with a huff and stalked off.

"I can't help that your job is boring." Raoul yelled at her retreating back.

**But according to him I'm beautiful, incredible, he can't get me out of his head.**

**According to him I'm funny, irresistible everything he ever wanted.**

There was no way Christine could miss again on Monday, the new play they had been rehearsing was opening Friday. She tried her hardest to delay what was inevitable, seeing Erik, but he found her at lunch time. Holding up her hand to stop his words that were already spilling out of his mouth, she took a deep breath. "I love Raoul Erik, but I have feelings for you too, things are complicated."

"You have no idea how incredible you are." Erik said as he took a step closer to Christine, but she held her back up to stop him.

"I just need time to think."

His face seemed to fall a bit, but he nodded. "Just tell me what you decide either way. I just have to know."

**Everything is opposite, I don't feel like stopping it**

**So baby tell me what I've got to loose**

**He's into me for everything I'm not, according to you**

Thankfully Erik didn't try to bring it back up through the next few days and everything got very hectic with the opening. Christine became more confused about her feelings and started taking an overview on how Raoul treated her, and how Erik treated her.

Christine brought it up to Raoul that he treated her very poorly. "If you were anything like you pretend to be Christine then I could see your point. Raoul shot at her.

"You don't even realize that your pushing me out the door, and your going to end up loosing me, is that what you want?" Christine asked with tears pouring down her face.

"If anyone is loosing something Christine it's you."

**I need to feel appreciated, like I'm not hated, oh no**

**Why can't you see me through his eyes**

**It's too bad your making me decide**

"Why can't you appreciate me? You say you love me, but your actions and hurtful words show me that you don't. There's someone out there that sees the good in me, and I love him." Christine put her hands over her mouth and her eyes popped open. She didn't mean to say that.

Raoul's face contorted into rage and he rounded on Christine. "You have to decide right now Christine. It's me, the man you've been with for years, or someone you barely know, he is just saying those things to you to to sleep with you. If you walk out, you can't come back Christine."

Standing there hearing those words said to her, Christine turned on her heel and walked to the bedroom, and started throwing things into her suitcase. This was an easy decision. She no longer loved Raoul, that was plain to her.

**According to me your stupid, your useless, you can't do anything right**

It didn't matter to Christine what she packed right now, she would be back, but only for her things. This felt right. Walking out of the room she stared at Raoul.

"You don't deserve me. You are the one who can't do anything right, if you can't treat the woman you love like you actually love her, then your the stupid one." Christine had never talked to Raoul like that before, and it felt good. "Your the one who's loosing out." She said and walked out the door without looking back.

**But according to him I'm beautiful, incredible e can't get me out of his head**

**According to him I'm funny, irresistible, everything he ever wanted**

Christine took a deep breath before she knocked on Erik's door. He opened it and looked at her suitcase and his eyebrows shot up. "I choose you." Christine said with a smile. Erik took the suitcase out of her hand and dropped it to the floor and pulled Christine against him.

"You have no idea how happy your making me. Your the only woman I'll ever want. I love you." He whispered in Christine's ear.

Without even asking, Erik brought Christine into his little house with suitcase, and it was like they've been together forever, for it was just like normal for Christine to be there. That weekend they both collected the rest of Christine's stuff, and Raoul was not pleased to find it was Erik Christine now loved.

**Everything is opposite, I don't feel like stopping it**

**So baby tell me what I've got too loose, he's into me for everything I'm not**

**According to you, according to you**

Christine had never been this happy as she was now. She wasn't used to being told she was beautiful everyday, she felt like she was in the twilight zone.

Several months later Christine ran into Raoul on the street as she was picking up dinner for her and Erik, and he asked how she was.

"I'm very happy Raoul." She replied with a smile. The smirk vanished from his face.

"I still say he's only into the 'pretend Christine', not the real Christine."

Christine couldn't help but continue to smile at Raoul. "No, this is who I really am, you got the pretend Christine." Then she turned and left him staring at her and she returned to Erik and never though about her time with Raoul again.

**So please let me know what you think of this chapter, I was super bored at work and wrote it down on a notebook because I didn't have my computer, so please review, review, review because I've been getting like no reviews for this story, and that makes me so sad because I think some of my best writing is in this story!**

**Desiree'**


	7. Gravity

**Disclaimer: I do not own Phantom of the Opera, or Gravity by Sara Barellies. **Okay first off I just wanted to say: Katie, I love you and you are my best friend. **Warning: This is another Raoul bashing so leave if your just going to yell at me for bashing Raoul.** This is a modern day, and Erik is in it, but as a side character. There is another ending but I thought this one was best...sorta. **Oh and it is rated T for foul language, so beware of that to. **

**Gravity**

**Something always brings me back to you**

**It never takes to long**

Shaking my head I just couldn't do it. I loved him, and I can't be without him. That's what love is about right? Not being able to be without them, we were soul mates. No, he wasn't perfect, but it was something I could live with. I looked at the small bruises on my upper arm that had almost disappeared and I sighed as I got out of my car and walked up the small path to his small house. Our small house.

Unlocking the door I quietly walked in, I knew he was home, his car was in the drive next to my little car. "Raoul?" I called out, but no answer came back to me. I had only been gone for three nights, and three hellish nights it had been. I loved him, and he loved me back. Not everyone thought so, but I knew. Rough he may be, but I can see the love in his eyes when it's just the two of us.

"Raoul?" I called out again and I saw him sitting on the couch hunched over, his head down. He felt guilty, you could see it in his body language and my heart seemed to break, I put him through that guilt and I was quickly at his side sitting on the couch with him, putting my arm around his masculine shoulders. "Don't be upset, I'm home now. For good this time." I whispered softly in his ear and he nodded his head and sniffed, like he had been crying.

I kissed the top of his head. "You're fine. I'm here now, were here now." I said and reached down and grasped his hands in my own, he finally looked up at me, and his eyes were red and puffy, I had been right, he had been crying. I knew he loved me. He didn't like to hurt me, and felt guilty about it because he loved me.

"I love you Christine, you know that right?" Raoul asked me, and I gave him a smile.

"Of course I do, I love you too."

**No matter what I say or do**

**I still feel you here, till the moment I'm gone**

Like usual the first week or so was beautiful with the two of us. We got on wonderfully, we loved each other and made each other work, like a real relationship was, but then things started to slip. Just little things. He would get mad at something small and yell, then the yelling turned to slapping, then punching until I broke down and left claiming it would be forever, but it wasn't. I was always coming back to him.

When we were in the bad moments I could always feel Raoul, he left his marks on me. Always in places that no one else could see. He might slap me on the face, but he wouldn't bruise me, those he saved for my arms, stomach, thighs, back. I could even feel him when he wasn't with me, my arms throbbed and ached, my legs felt like jelly, and I had a constant stomach ache, my back was so sore sometimes it hurt just to stand erect.

The only time I couldn't feel Raoul was when I was singing, and that was only for an hour or two a day. My singing gave Raoul a headache, it was 'loud and chirpy' so I never did it with him, but my singing took me out of my own senses and everything else was completely forgotten. The sore muscles, the weakness, everything vanished.

Of course being out of my own senses, I didn't try to listen to him returning, and I was still practicing when he came in, that earned me a slap in the face, bringing me to tears. The second he saw me in tears he changed and came forth and kissed my stinging cheek.

"I'm sorry baby, I've had a long day." Raoul said softly and all was forgiven. That was my curse, the power to forgive so easily.

"No, I shouldn't have been practicing when you were home, I know how it hurts your head." I said and placed my hand over my burning cheek.

**You hold me with out touch**

**You keep me without chains**

Keeping a job wasn't something I could do. People were to smart, they recognized the cry of long sleeves, and pants in summer, the way I moved slowly because I was sore and urged me to get help and leave Raoul, but I couldn't, his love was there, and that kept me to him. We were soul mates, and people didn't understand, so I would quit.

I had no family, he was it, and I didn't have any friends, besides one, and it was very rocky. When I was with Raoul, she wouldn't speak to me, but when I finally got the courage to leave, she welcomed me with open arms, until I went back. Meg always said Raoul had me chained to him and all I had to do was saw the chain, but Raoul didn't keep me with chains, he kept me with his love. That was all I needed, his love.

Though his touch was often hard and not soft, like I wanted it to be so much. Even when I did things perfect and he was happy with me, it felt like he was only a shell when he held me. I want that loving touch that he had when I always came home, that was only after I left, and he would fear I wasn't ever coming home, then he would reward me with kisses and heartfelt hugs, those were the moments that I was always looking for, the love that would keep me with him, and I was right, he loved me.

Every once in a while though, even when we were in our bad moments he would love me like I knew he does. His hugs would be genuine and warm and loving and I would melt in his arms like butter over popcorn.

I loved those moments.

**I never wanted anything so much**

**Than to drown in your love and not feel your rain**

Raoul could tell that's all I wanted, was a little love, I was so much happier when he was nice to me, I didn't cry and I laughed, he said he always liked to hear me laugh, that was music to his ears. When we were happy together I couldn't feel any of the coldness, and he would drown me in my own emotions and I couldn't see the dark storm clouds coming to bring unpleasantness and hurt.

His love was all that mattered to me, I needed him to love me back, and he did. I needed Raoul more than I needed my basic essentials, food, air, sleep. I would rather spend my time with Raoul, just looking at him, touching him, holding him, than to eat a 7 course meal made for the Queen of England, take a deep breath after coming out from being under the water for two minutes at a pool, sleep in a California King bed that was made just for me, I would gladly give all that up just for Raoul, and he rewarded me by loving me back.

I needed him so much that it hurt, and the only thing that kept me in balance was his love for me, that was my bliss, and I could breath when I was with him, when I didn't see the storm clouds coming, then I was ache for the moment when he was so deep in love with me that those clouds retreated.

**Set me free, leave me be**

**I don't fall another moment into your gravity**

Then Raoul would go to far, like he did again tonight. I did nothing wrong and he punched me in the stomach making me double over coughing trying to get over the feeling that I was going to puke up my guts. It was the same every time, I would let him apologize then we would go to bed, like I had forgiven him and leave in the dark of night like the coward I was, and flee to Meg's house, where she welcomed me with open arms, again.

How could someone I love so much and who loved me so much pull me down that much? When I was away from Raoul like this I could open my eyes and realize that he was all wrong for me, that I was so much better off without him. As usual Meg wanted me to go to the hospital, but I would never let her, I think this time he broke one of my ribs because my whole torso felt like it was on fire, and I could barely hitch in a breath, though I think part of it was because I was away from Raoul, I missed him, I loved him.

Already he was starting to work on me and I had only left him a few hours ago. I already couldn't sleep, I didn't want to eat, I didn't want to breath, though part of that was because it hurt to do so. How can I want to be out from under his pull, yet at the same time already be burning to be back with him? I wanted to be back under his pull, his power, but not this early, I wanted to let him sweat it out a bit.

**Here I am and I stand so tall**

**Just the way I'm supposed to be**

Going back to Raoul only after a day would do no good. So the next day Meg, her boyfriend Erik and I went back to my house to pick up a few necessities, clothes, toiletries, things of that nature, and of course Raoul was there, he was always home after I left, just waiting for me to come back, but no, not this time, I would stand my ground, keep my head held high and finally get rid of this bad influence in my life.

Meg and I learned a long time ago, that Raoul would never try to keep me home when I returned to get my things, but in fear of my safety, I always brought another girl and guy to help me in case he changed his mind.

This is the way I should be, standing up for myself, doing what's right, though when I saw Raoul sitting on the couch with his chin on his chest like he was ashamed of himself, well my heart broke, and Meg saw the look on my face and got me out of the house quickly.

**But your onto me and all over me**

Just as I was leaving the house Raoul looked up and into my eyes, his was red and puffy, same as mine, and he could see the love still in my eyes, because I could see it in his, and he nodded his head, like he knew what I was thinking and hung his head once more.

It was the same every time, he would see that I was still in love and he knew I would come back, in my own time, and he would be sitting there waiting on me.

Once we were out to the car, Raoul did something he had never done before, he rushed out to the car where I was putting on my seat belt. Erik was quickly out of the car and shook his head crossing his arms, Erik was a very tall and intimidating guy, but Raoul stopped short of Erik's reach.

"Please Chris, I love you, just come home to me, and we can be happy, it won't be like the last time, I swear." Raoul said, pleading me.

When I looked at Meg she had a frown on her face and shook her head. "I just need to say goodbye, this is the last time, I won't be going back." I said softly already undoing my seat belt.

"No Christine, you know you won't come back if you go back to him, please, just stay with me, I can help you get over him, he's not good for you, please just don't go back." Meg started to plead grabbing my wrist.

"I have to say goodbye."

**You loved me cause I'm fragile**

**When I thought that I was strong**

Meg was right of course, he cried and hugged me and I felt his love in that hug, and made me melt all over again, this time with my head hung low, I told Meg and Erik to go, that I would be fine with Raoul, that things would be different.

"One time Christine, I won't be there to take you in." Meg threatened and drove off crying with Erik trying to comfort her.

"You won't have to go back Chris, I love you and I swear it will be different this time." Raoul whispered in my ear already breaking my strong self-independence.

I remembered the first time Raoul and I had met, it was at the park, I was walking Meg's dog at the time and we ran into each other, he was walking his dog as well, and he said I was to petite to be walking a St. Bernard, though I had never had troubles with Max before, and I laughed as he took the leash out of my hands and we ended up staying at the park walking our dogs for three hours, when Meg finally came and found me, but not before I left Raoul with my phone number.

When we returned home, there was already a message from Raoul asking me out to dinner the next night, I didn't have to think twice about saying no, I was already falling for him.

**But you touch me for a little while**

**All all my fragile strength is gone**

Once again, Raoul and I were happy, but only for a few hours, his happiness that I had returned didn't work out like when I was gone for a few days, he didn't have time to get worried about me, and miss me and really think about not hitting me. He had already slapped me when I told him that I hated to see Meg drive off crying.

"So you are planning on leaving me then." Raoul screamed at me, and tear rolled down my cheek.

"No, she's my friend, and I don't want her to get mad at me." I said softly already wishing I had the strength that I had a few hours ago wanting to finally leave Raoul for good.

"Fuck you Chris! Just go, go back to your friend, and you will loose all of our love, and when you come crawling back I won't be here." Raoul screamed and stormed out of the front room throwing pictures onto the floor from the walls, my hand was already on the phone dialing Meg's number.

"Please just hurry and come get me Meg." I begged, and she sighed.

"Of course, we'll be there in a few minutes, just be read to bolt." Meg said and I quickly hung up the phone.

Less than three minutes Raoul came back and bent down on his knees in front of me and hugged me close to him, and I was standing over him. "I'm sorry, please don't leave, I love you, and I always will, I don't want you to leave me. Stay with me, and we can be happy." But as soon as he heard those words we heard the honking of the horn, Meg had already gotten here.

I tried to play off like it wasn't for us but Raoul knew and he got up and slapped me again, bringing me to my knees this time and now it was Raoul standing over me.

After five minutes the front door opened and Erik came in looking beyond pissed off to see me on the floor holding my cheek, he quickly punched Raoul, with me screaming not to hurt him, and Erik literally picked me up off the floor and took me outside to Meg's waiting arms, like always.

**Set me free leave me be**

**I don't wanna fall another moment into your gravity**

Raoul came chasing after us, but this time Erik didn't let Raoul speak he punched him again, but Raoul was ready for the punch and ducked, getting Erik right in the stomach, I knew how bad it hurt, as Erik doubled over, but bringing his fist up with a strong uppercut to the stomach.

I broke free of Meg's grasp by the car and pushed the two men apart, Meg already all over Erik making sure he was okay. I pulled Raoul up out of his crouch to make sure he was okay, but I was still angry for the recent beating.

"Stop Raoul, I can't be with you anymore, just let me go, I deserve better, and I don't want to be in your pull anymore. Just leave me be."

**Here I am and I stand so tall**

**Just the way I'm supposed to be**

"No Chris no. I'm sorry, I can change I promise." Raoul begged me, but I stood my ground, I had never told Raoul that I was leaving, I always just left while he was asleep or at work, but this time I was standing my ground, letting him know it wasn't okay, this wasn't something I was going to live with, not anymore.

"No Raoul, I'm not your punching bag, not anymore. I'm my own person, and I don't deserve this. If you really loved me you wouldn't hurt me like you do, and I just can't do it anymore Raoul." I said the tears already coursing down my cheeks.

It was time to stand tall for myself, and I finally was.

**But your onto me, and all over me**

Raoul wasn't going to give up that easily and pulled me into a hug, a real hug, I could feel his warmth and love radiating out through that hug, and I melted, damn his loving powers, he had me under a vice and I couldn't get out from under it. When he loved me like this, I didn't want to get out from under it. I loved him.

Because I faltered, Raoul knew. He let go and kissed me, looking into my eyes, and he saw the love, and he knew that even if he did let me go that I would come back, and I knew it was true too, I knew he did love me, he just lost his temper and I was the only one around to receive the angry blows. So with the last kiss, I gave him one more look, and felt Meg's hands on my arms, already pulling me back to her, and Raoul willingly let go of me, and I stumbled backwards looking at Raoul, while being pulled to the car.

Standing there, he put his hands in his pockets and watching as I got in the car, and as we drove off he hung his head, I could tell he already felt ashamed of himself as we rode off into the darkening night.

**I live here on my knees as I try to make you see **

**that your everything I think I need here on the ground**

Though while I was at Meg's I wasn't around Raoul's loving nature and it was hard to remember why I wanted to be with him, I still loved him, that was true, but at the moment, my cheek hurt from the slap, my side hurt from where he had kicked me while I was waiting on Erik and Meg's rescue, and I couldn't sleep.

When I woke, I needed some time to myself, so I actually went back to the park where I had first met Raoul, the Raoul I loved, not the one that hit me. I sat on the park bench and watched as families with small children started to show up, screaming with cheer and parents laying blankets out, watching their kids have fun chase other kids and dig holes in the sand, swinging, sliding, and I felt a hand on my shoulder making me jump and turn around to see Raoul.

"I knew I would find you here. Please Chris, don't stay gone to long, I feel horrible, and I love you, I want you to come home."

Looking into his eyes already made me melt and want to say okay, but for once there was a little nagging inside my brain that was telling me to remember what his loving hand had done to me only a few hours ago.

"Raoul, how can you love me, and hit me at the same time? I don't get it. I love you, and you won't let me live up to the potential that I know I can be, please I just need you to love me like I deserve to be loved, I need you to realize that I do love you, but please let me live." I begged as he walked around the bench and sat down next to me.

**But your neither friend nor foe**

**Though I can't seem to let you go.**

"I don't know why I hit you Chris. I'm sorry." Raoul said softly, that was when I realized that it would never stop. He wouldn't be good for me, but at the same time I felt he wouldn't be bad for me. These feelings were to confusing and I couldn't keep my head from spinning out of control.

Why couldn't I just realize that he was all wrong for me and let him out of my life? I don't know, but a part of me was still holding strong, and that part was my heart. I still loved him and that drew me to him, though I knew it was bad for me, he was bad for me, but at the same time, he wasn't, and I hated myself for this.

Yes, no, yes, no, yes, no. I couldn't make up my mind and tears sprang to my eyes. "I'm sorry Raoul I can't do this, I can't be with you, I meant it the other night, your not good for me. Don't follow me, don't contact me, I will be sending some people to collect my things. Were done." I said and got up off the bench, not looking back to see him looking sad and guilty.

**The only thing that I still know is that your keeping me down**

**Keeping me down**

I knew that it was because of him that I wasn't already married and have kids. I didn't want to marry him when it seemed like we couldn't go three months without me leaving him, what kind of marriage would that be, and to bring kids into that kind of relationship would just be cruel. He was keeping me pinned down.

This time I was serious about not going back with Raoul, it had been almost two months since that day at the park, and Raoul didn't try to call, didn't try to see me. I was slowly letting go of Raoul and for the first time in years I was living as my own woman, except I was still having problems. I couldn't seem to sleep still, I couldn't seem to eat, and it was because of the loss of Raoul.

"It's positive Christine." The doctor had said.

Looking up at him I couldn't believe what I was hearing, I was pregnant, it wasn't because of Raoul I couldn't sleep, why I couldn't keep anything down, I was pregnant, and there was no guess as to who's it was, I had only ever been with one man. I had to go back to the lion's den, Raoul had a right to know that he was going to be a father, I didn't even call Meg and tell her what was going on, I drove right to Raoul's house. It seemed that Raoul had gotten over me as well, his car wasn't there.

So I sat and waited for him to get home.

**Your onto me onto me, and all over...**

When Raoul saw me sitting on his stoop I could tell he was shocked, but let me into the house, and when I told him the news his face lit up and he hugged me, and I felt the love, and my heart lurched after being kept on lock down for two months.

"This is it Chris. This changes everything, we can get married, start a family, I know I've said this so many times before, but things will be different, I promise you that, we are going to be a family, I love you Christine." Raoul said and kissed me and I cried, I still loved him too.

**Something always brings me back to you**

**It never takes to long**

Raoul was right, things were different, I came back and he never laid another hand on me, he yelled and got mad, but he was working on it. I always come back to Raoul. We got married three weeks after I came back and 6 months later we had a little baby boy to which we named him James. My life wasn't being brought down by Raoul, he was only lifting it up, him and James.

Now I was glad I didn't always listen to Meg. She was even starting to warm to Raoul a touch, and Erik, well that was still complicated but the four of us hung out from time to time and my life was getting back on track.

**So please let me know what you think. Special thanks go out to **PhantomTwilighter2009 **For adding my story to their favorite list! If you have not heard Gravity, please to listen to it on youtube, oh also if you like the song and you like to watch people dance you should search for Kupono and kayla addiction on youtube, but beware it's so sad, I cry almost every time. Please leave me a review, oh and also check out my main Phantom story Things That Should Never Happen, also me and my bff Katie are writing a Harry Potter spin off on fictionpress, the link is on my main page, so go check that one out to, that would really rock. Hope all my wonderful readers love this story.**

**Desiree'  
**


	8. Gravity Part 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything related to Phantom of the Opera, nor the song Gravity by Sara Bareilles.**

**Gravity**

**Something always brings me back to you**

**It never takes to long**

Shaking my head I just couldn't do it. I loved him, and I can't be without him. That's what love is about right? Not being able to be without them, we were soul mates. No, he wasn't perfect, but it was something I could live with. I looked at the small bruises on my upper arm that had almost disappeared and I sighed as I got out of my car and walked up the small path to his small house. Our small house.

Unlocking the door I quietly walked in, I knew he was home, his car was in the drive next to my little car. "Raoul?" I called out, but no answer came back to me. I had only been gone for three nights, and three hellish nights it had been. I loved him, and he loved me back. Not everyone thought so, but I knew. Rough he may be, but I can see the love in his eyes when it's just the two of us.

"Raoul?" I called out again and I saw him sitting on the couch hunched over, his head down. He felt guilty, you could see it in his body language and my heart seemed to break, I put him through that guilt and I was quickly at his side sitting on the couch with him, putting my arm around his masculine shoulders. "Don't be upset, I'm home now. For good this time." I whispered softly in his ear and he nodded his head and sniffed, like he had been crying.

I kissed the top of his head. "You're fine. I'm here now, were here now." I said and reached down and grasped his hands in my own, he finally looked up at me, and his eyes were red and puffy, I had been right, he had been crying. I knew he loved me. He didn't like to hurt me, and felt guilty about it because he loved me.

"I love you Christine, you know that right?" Raoul asked me, and I gave him a smile.

"Of course I do, I love you too."

**No matter what I say or do**

**I still feel you here, till the moment I'm gone**

Like usual the first week or so was beautiful with the two of us. We got on wonderfully, we loved each other and made each other work, like a real relationship was, but then things started to slip. Just little things. He would get mad at something small and yell, then the yelling turned to slapping, then punching until I broke down and left claiming it would be forever, but it wasn't. I was always coming back to him.

When we were in the bad moments I could always feel Raoul, he left his marks on me. Always in places that no one else could see. He might slap me on the face, but he wouldn't bruise me, those he saved for my arms, stomach, thighs, back. I could even feel him when he wasn't with me, my arms throbbed and ached, my legs felt like jelly, and I had a constant stomach ache, my back was so sore sometimes it hurt just to stand erect.

The only time I couldn't feel Raoul was when I was singing, and that was only for an hour or two a day. My singing gave Raoul a headache, it was 'loud and chirpy' so I never did it with him, but my singing took me out of my own senses and everything else was completely forgotten. The sore muscles, the weakness, everything vanished.

Of course being out of my own senses, I didn't try to listen to him returning, and I was still practicing when he came in, that earned me a slap in the face, bringing me to tears. The second he saw me in tears he changed and came forth and kissed my stinging cheek.

"I'm sorry baby, I've had a long day." Raoul said softly and all was forgiven. That was my curse, the power to forgive so easily.

"No, I shouldn't have been practicing when you were home, I know how it hurts your head." I said and placed my hand over my burning cheek.

**You hold me with out touch**

**You keep me without chains**

Keeping a job wasn't something I could do. People were to smart, they recognized the cry of long sleeves, and pants in summer, the way I moved slowly because I was sore and urged me to get help and leave Raoul, but I couldn't, his love was there, and that kept me to him. We were soul mates, and people didn't understand, so I would quit.

I had no family, he was it, and I didn't have any friends, besides one, and it was very rocky. When I was with Raoul, she wouldn't speak to me, but when I finally got the courage to leave, she welcomed me with open arms, until I went back. Meg always said Raoul had me chained to him and all I had to do was saw the chain, but Raoul didn't keep me with chains, he kept me with his love. That was all I needed, his love.

Though his touch was often hard and not soft, like I wanted it to be so much. Even when I did things perfect and he was happy with me, it felt like he was only a shell when he held me. I want that loving touch that he had when I always came home, that was only after I left, and he would fear I wasn't ever coming home, then he would reward me with kisses and heartfelt hugs, those were the moments that I was always looking for, the love that would keep me with him, and I was right, he loved me.

Every once in a while though, even when we were in our bad moments he would love me like I knew he does. His hugs would be genuine and warm and loving and I would melt in his arms like butter over popcorn.

I loved those moments.

**I never wanted anything so much**

**Than to drown in your love and not feel your rain**

Raoul could tell that's all I wanted, was a little love, I was so much happier when he was nice to me, I didn't cry and I laughed, he said he always liked to hear me laugh, that was music to his ears. When we were happy together I couldn't feel any of the coldness, and he would drown me in my own emotions and I couldn't see the dark storm clouds coming to bring unpleasantness and hurt.

His love was all that mattered to me, I needed him to love me back, and he did. I needed Raoul more than I needed my basic essentials, food, air, sleep. I would rather spend my time with Raoul, just looking at him, touching him, holding him, than to eat a 7 course meal made for the Queen of England, take a deep breath after coming out from being under the water for two minutes at a pool, sleep in a California King bed that was made just for me, I would gladly give all that up just for Raoul, and he rewarded me by loving me back.

I needed him so much that it hurt, and the only thing that kept me in balance was his love for me, that was my bliss, and I could breath when I was with him, when I didn't see the storm clouds coming, then I was ache for the moment when he was so deep in love with me that those clouds retreated.

**Set me free, leave me be**

**I don't fall another moment into your gravity**

Then Raoul would go to far, like he did again tonight. I did nothing wrong and he punched me in the stomach making me double over coughing trying to get over the feeling that I was going to puke up my guts. It was the same every time, I would let him apologize then we would go to bed, like I had forgiven him and leave in the dark of night like the coward I was, and flee to Meg's house, where she welcomed me with open arms, again.

How could someone I love so much and who loved me so much pull me down that much? When I was away from Raoul like this I could open my eyes and realize that he was all wrong for me, that I was so much better off without him. As usual Meg wanted me to go to the hospital, but I would never let her, I think this time he broke one of my ribs because my whole torso felt like it was on fire, and I could barely hitch in a breath, though I think part of it was because I was away from Raoul, I missed him, I loved him.

Already he was starting to work on me and I had only left him a few hours ago. I already couldn't sleep, I didn't want to eat, I didn't want to breath, though part of that was because it hurt to do so. How can I want to be out from under his pull, yet at the same time already be burning to be back with him? I wanted to be back under his pull, his power, but not this early, I wanted to let him sweat it out a bit.

**Here I am and I stand so tall**

**Just the way I'm supposed to be**

Going back to Raoul only after a day would do no good. So the next day Meg, her boyfriend Erik and I went back to my house to pick up a few necessities, clothes, toiletries, things of that nature, and of course Raoul was there, he was always home after I left, just waiting for me to come back, but no, not this time, I would stand my ground, keep my head held high and finally get rid of this bad influence in my life.

Meg and I learned a long time ago, that Raoul would never try to keep me home when I returned to get my things, but in fear of my safety, I always brought another girl and guy to help me in case he changed his mind.

This is the way I should be, standing up for myself, doing what's right, though when I saw Raoul sitting on the couch with his chin on his chest like he was ashamed of himself, well my heart broke, and Meg saw the look on my face and got me out of the house quickly.

**But your onto me and all over me**

Just as I was leaving the house Raoul looked up and into my eyes, his was red and puffy, same as mine, and he could see the love still in my eyes, because I could see it in his, and he nodded his head, like he knew what I was thinking and hung his head once more.

It was the same every time, he would see that I was still in love and he knew I would come back, in my own time, and he would be sitting there waiting on me.

Once we were out to the car, Raoul did something he had never done before, he rushed out to the car where I was putting on my seat belt. Erik was quickly out of the car and shook his head crossing his arms, Erik was a very tall and intimidating guy, but Raoul stopped short of Erik's reach.

"Please Chris, I love you, just come home to me, and we can be happy, it won't be like the last time, I swear." Raoul said, pleading me.

When I looked at Meg she had a frown on her face and shook her head. "I just need to say goodbye, this is the last time, I won't be going back." I said softly already undoing my seat belt.

"No Christine, you know you won't come back if you go back to him, please, just stay with me, I can help you get over him, he's not good for you, please just don't go back." Meg started to plead grabbing my wrist.

"I have to say goodbye."

**You loved me cause I'm fragile**

**When I thought that I was strong**

Meg was right of course, he cried and hugged me and I felt his love in that hug, and made me melt all over again, this time with my head hung low, I told Meg and Erik to go, that I would be fine with Raoul, that things would be different.

"One time Christine, I won't be there to take you in." Meg threatened and drove off crying with Erik trying to comfort her.

"You won't have to go back Chris, I love you and I swear it will be different this time." Raoul whispered in my ear already breaking my strong self-independence.

I remembered the first time Raoul and I had met, it was at the park, I was walking Meg's dog at the time and we ran into each other, he was walking his dog as well, and he said I was to petite to be walking a St. Bernard, though I had never had troubles with Max before, and I laughed as he took the leash out of my hands and we ended up staying at the park walking our dogs for three hours, when Meg finally came and found me, but not before I left Raoul with my phone number.

When we returned home, there was already a message from Raoul asking me out to dinner the next night, I didn't have to think twice about saying no, I was already falling for him.

**But you touch me for a little while**

**All all my fragile strength is gone**

Once again, Raoul and I were happy, but only for a few hours, his happiness that I had returned didn't work out like when I was gone for a few days, he didn't have time to get worried about me, and miss me and really think about not hitting me. He had already slapped me when I told him that I hated to see Meg drive off crying.

"So you are planning on leaving me then." Raoul screamed at me, and tear rolled down my cheek.

"No, she's my friend, and I don't want her to get mad at me." I said softly already wishing I had the strength that I had a few hours ago wanting to finally leave Raoul for good.

"Fuck you Chris! Just go, go back to your friend, and you will loose all of our love, and when you come crawling back I won't be here." Raoul screamed and stormed out of the front room throwing pictures onto the floor from the walls, my hand was already on the phone dialing Meg's number.

"Please just hurry and come get me Meg." I begged, and she sighed.

"Of course, we'll be there in a few minutes, just be read to bolt." Meg said and I quickly hung up the phone.

Less than three minutes Raoul came back and bent down on his knees in front of me and hugged me close to him, and I was standing over him. "I'm sorry, please don't leave, I love you, and I always will, I don't want you to leave me. Stay with me, and we can be happy." But as soon as he heard those words we heard the honking of the horn, Meg had already gotten here.

I tried to play off like it wasn't for us but Raoul knew and he got up and slapped me again, bringing me to my knees this time and now it was Raoul standing over me.

After five minutes the front door opened and Erik came in looking beyond pissed off to see me on the floor holding my cheek, he quickly punched Raoul, with me screaming not to hurt him, and Erik literally picked me up off the floor and took me outside to Meg's waiting arms, like always.

**Set me free leave me be**

**I don't wanna fall another moment into your gravity**

Raoul came chasing after us, but this time Erik didn't let Raoul speak he punched him again, but Raoul was ready for the punch and ducked, getting Erik right in the stomach, I knew how bad it hurt, as Erik doubled over, but bringing his fist up with a strong uppercut to the stomach.

I broke free of Meg's grasp by the car and pushed the two men apart, Meg already all over Erik making sure he was okay. I pulled Raoul up out of his crouch to make sure he was okay, but I was still angry for the recent beating.

"Stop Raoul, I can't be with you anymore, just let me go, I deserve better, and I don't want to be in your pull anymore. Just leave me be."

**Here I am and I stand so tall**

**Just the way I'm supposed to be**

"No Chris no. I'm sorry, I can change I promise." Raoul begged me, but I stood my ground, I had never told Raoul that I was leaving, I always just left while he was asleep or at work, but this time I was standing my ground, letting him know it wasn't okay, this wasn't something I was going to live with, not anymore.

"No Raoul, I'm not your punching bag, not anymore. I'm my own person, and I don't deserve this. If you really loved me you wouldn't hurt me like you do, and I just can't do it anymore Raoul." I said the tears already coursing down my cheeks.

It was time to stand tall for myself, and I finally was.

**But your onto me, and all over me**

Raoul wasn't going to give up that easily and pulled me into a hug, a real hug, I could feel his warmth and love radiating out through that hug, and I melted, damn his loving powers, he had me under a vice and I couldn't get out from under it. When he loved me like this, I didn't want to get out from under it. I loved him.

Because I faltered, Raoul knew. He let go and kissed me, looking into my eyes, and he saw the love, and he knew that even if he did let me go that I would come back, and I knew it was true too, I knew he did love me, he just lost his temper and I was the only one around to receive the angry blows. So with the last kiss, I gave him one more look, and felt Meg's hands on my arms, already pulling me back to her, and Raoul willingly let go of me, and I stumbled backwards looking at Raoul, while being pulled to the car.

Standing there, he put his hands in his pockets and watching as I got in the car, and as we drove off he hung his head, I could tell he already felt ashamed of himself as we rode off into the darkening night.

**I live here on my knees as I try to make you see **

**that your everything I think I need here on the ground**

Though while I was at Meg's I wasn't around Raoul's loving nature and it was hard to remember why I wanted to be with him, I still loved him, that was true, but at the moment, my cheek hurt from the slap, my side hurt from where he had kicked me while I was waiting on Erik and Meg's rescue, and I couldn't sleep.

When I woke, I needed some time to myself, so I actually went back to the park where I had first met Raoul, the Raoul I loved, not the one that hit me. I sat on the park bench and watched as families with small children started to show up, screaming with cheer and parents laying blankets out, watching their kids have fun chase other kids and dig holes in the sand, swinging, sliding, and I felt a hand on my shoulder making me jump and turn around to see Raoul.

"I knew I would find you here. Please Chris, don't stay gone to long, I feel horrible, and I love you, I want you to come home."

Looking into his eyes already made me melt and want to say okay, but for once there was a little nagging inside my brain that was telling me to remember what his loving hand had done to me only a few hours ago.

"Raoul, how can you love me, and hit me at the same time? I don't get it. I love you, and you won't let me live up to the potential that I know I can be, please I just need you to love me like I deserve to be loved, I need you to realize that I do love you, but please let me live." I begged as he walked around the bench and sat down next to me.

**But your neither friend nor foe**

**Though I can't seem to let you go.**

"I don't know why I hit you Chris. I'm sorry." Raoul said softly, that was when I realized that it would never stop. He wouldn't be good for me, but at the same time I felt he wouldn't be bad for me. These feelings were to confusing and I couldn't keep my head from spinning out of control.

Why couldn't I just realize that he was all wrong for me and let him out of my life? I don't know, but a part of me was still holding strong, and that part was my heart. I still loved him and that drew me to him, though I knew it was bad for me, he was bad for me, but at the same time, he wasn't, and I hated myself for this.

Yes, no, yes, no, yes, no. I couldn't make up my mind and tears sprang to my eyes. "I'm sorry Raoul I can't do this, I can't be with you, I meant it the other night, your not good for me. Don't follow me, don't contact me, I will be sending some people to collect my things. Were done." I said and got up off the bench, not looking back to see him looking sad and guilty.

**The only thing that I still know is that your keeping me down**

**Keeping me down**

I knew that it was because of him that I wasn't already married and have kids. I didn't want to marry him when it seemed like we couldn't go three months without me leaving him, what kind of marriage would that be, and to bring kids into that kind of relationship would just be cruel. He was keeping me pinned down.

This time I was serious about not going back with Raoul, like I was so many times before, it had been almost two months since that day at the park, and Raoul didn't try to call, didn't try to see me. I was slowly letting go of Raoul and for the first time in years I was living as my own woman, but I just couldn't seem to get Raoul out of my mind, even though I was still thinking horrible thoughts about him, I was still thinking about him.

**Your onto me onto me, and all over...**

It was when I was asleep that I remembered that I loved Raoul, or tried to delude myself that I loved him. My head and my heart were in two different places and I couldn't seem to wrap my head around the fact that my heart still ached for Raoul, even after all the horrible things he has done to me, said to me, and kept me from doing, I just didn't understand why I still loved that man.

In my dreams things were always so good between us, loving, caring, tender. He would hold me and kiss me and I would feel my heart swell at his tender touch. I would cling to him because I knew in my head that this was a dream, then I would feel myself start to come up out of that wonderful dream and I would wake up with tears on my face knowing that what I want so much is something I knew couldn't happen.

Half my head was wrapped around Raoul, knowing I still loved him, and the other half was polluted by what Meg had told me, and what I really knew to be true, how much of a bad guy he was.

**Something always brings me back to you**

**It never takes to long**

Shaking my head I just couldn't do it even after these past few months. I loved him, and I can't be without him. That's what love is about right? Not being able to be without them, we were soul mates. No, he wasn't perfect, but it was something I could live with. I walked up the street and saw our little house. Our small house.

Unlocking the door I quietly walked in, I knew he was home, his car was in the drive next to my little car that looked like it hadn't been moved since I left. "Raoul?" I called out, but no answer came back to me. This time I had been gone for a little over two months, and I just couldn't fight anymore. I loved him, and he loved me back. Not everyone thought so, but I knew. Rough he may be, but I can see the love in his eyes when it's just the two of us.

"Raoul?" I called out again and I saw him sitting on the couch hunched over, his head down. He felt guilty, you could see it in his body language and my heart seemed to break, I put him through that guilt and I was quickly at his side sitting on the couch with him, putting my arm around his masculine shoulders. "Don't be upset, I'm home now. For good this time." I whispered softly in his ear, as I had many times before, and he nodded his head and sniffed, like he had been crying.

I kissed the top of his head. "You're fine. I'm here now, were here now." I said and reached down and grasped his hands in my own, he finally looked up at me, and his eyes were red and puffy, I had been right, he had been crying. I knew he loved me. He didn't like to hurt me, and felt guilty about it because he loved me.

"I love you Christine, you know that right?" Raoul asked me, and I gave him a smile.

"Of course I do, I love you too."

**Yes I know I've already published this story, but I didn't like how I ended it, so I changed it to the way I had originally wanted it. I hope people like the ending better this time, though it's not a happy ending. Please review and let me know what you think about the new ending.**

**Desiree'  
**


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